


You Can Have Me

by destielrose



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Pre-Slash, Touch-Starved
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-27
Updated: 2018-06-27
Packaged: 2019-05-29 06:40:23
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 483
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15067364
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/destielrose/pseuds/destielrose
Summary: Castiel never experiences human touch outside of violence.Finally, he decides to ask for what he needs.





	You Can Have Me

Dean didn't recognize himself. He waited up every night until Cas came home to the bunker. Because it was a freaking echo chamber, he could easily hear the door slam. If it was the slide of Cas's dress shoes on the stairs and not Sam's bounding-attack-puppy pattern, Dean would lie very still, almost not breathing, and _not pray_ that Cas would find a reason to come to Dean's room.

Sometimes, Cas did pause slightly outside Dean's door, his body haloed by the bunker's dim, night-mode lighting. _What is he thinking?_ _Why won't he just come inside, already_? But Cas never came in.

Until the night he did.

When Cas crossed the threshold of his room, Dean started breathing again.

"Hello, Dean."

Cas stood at the foot of Dean's bed for a long time and then sighed. Dean's eyes widened when Cas took off his trench coat and lay it across the desk chair next to the bed. The suit jacket and tie followed, and when Cas started unbuttoning his shirt, Dean squeaked and began to--what, exactly? Possibly flee?

"Don't worry, Dean. I'm not proposing that we have sex." His voice sounded so tired. "I've just. I mean. Today was..." Cas's throat clicked as he swallowed, and Dean was suddenly unparalyzed. He shoved his blankets off and stood up.

"Hey, buddy, it's okay." He could see Cas's face now, and there was more than fatigue on it. He hated to see his friend suffering. "C'mere," he said, and opened his arms.

Had they ever hugged like this before? Alone, with nobody dying or newly resurrected? Cas softened in Dean's arms and turned his head into the crook of Dean's neck. They stayed like that until their breathing entrained and Dean could hear his own heart beating in his ears.

"Thank you, Dean," Cas said, and pulled away, staring into Dean's eyes for long seconds. "Do you know how rarely I get to experience human touch?"

Something broke inside Dean. "Shit, Man. I never thought about that." Their fingers were still touching, and Dean slid his hands into Cas's. He squeezed, then rested his forehead against Cas's. "You tell me when you need this, okay?"

"Okay, Dean." A deep breath and then another sigh. "I will leave you to get your four hours."

"No, hey, Cas. Don't--" Dean huffed out a breath. "Hey, you don't have to leave yet. Why don't we lie down here and you can...if I fall asleep, you can watch over me. Like you used to. Just, you can...have me. Like this. If you want?"

Cas's smile was bright even in the low light.

"I'd like that."

Dean doesn't hold his breath anymore when Cas comes home, and Cas doesn't loom in the doorway. If he needs it, and he does more and more often, Castiel opens the door to Dean's room. And Dean always welcomes him inside.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm not sure if I will continue this, but if there is interest, I might!
> 
> This is also my first published fanfic :)


End file.
